Thankful Thursday: Lunchdates and Listening Ears

My brain is so frazzled lately that I can't even attempt to have an original blogging idea. But I need to blog. I need to express. I need to discuss. So today, I'm sticking with the Thankful Thursday topic idea that Tabitha and I use when we don't have a fresh idea.

Today, as the title implies, I am thankful for Lunch dates, and friends who always have an open listening ear. I have been dealing with a lot of stress lately, most of it centered around my job. I'm torn between responsibility to the students I have grown to love, and a responsibility to myself to make sure that I am the best possible me that I can be. I am stressed about finances, stressed about the future, and most of all, I am stressed about still not knowing what I want to be when I grow up.

That's right kids! Contrary to popular idealized belief, you will NOT necessarily know exactly what you want to do for the rest of your life once you walk across that stage, diploma in hand. Guess what? You probably won't know within the first 2-3 years after you graduate. I still have my idealized fantasies about what I want to do. I still know exactly what I would be doing if money were no object and healthcare costs were lower. But that's not always an option. Not right away anyway. Right now, I recognize the difference between want and need, and most of all I recognize that sometimes you just have to suck it up and do what you have to do in the interim to survive. It doesn't mean I have to let go of my dreams, though. On the contrary, I should hold on to them tighter than ever as a reminder of all that I am working to achieve.

Today I had lunch with two of my good friends from work, one who no longer works here, and one who does. It was such a stress relief to be able to talk about everything that I've been dealing with, and to openly discuss it with people who know. I love my boyfriend, and I love my family, and they are a fantastic support system, and really great listeners--but they're not here. They don't truly understand the day to day.

So we sat around the chips and salsa, eating our enchiladas and rice and beans and whatever else, and I just got to let it all out. It is amazing the support you can really feel when you open up to the right people about the right things. Not that it is ever wrong for other friends to be there for me, and not that I don't appreciate it. It's just that the commiseration and real deep understanding, people who aren't just telling you what you want to hear, or people who don't fully understand the gravity of the problem just never really get it.

Talking to these ladies over lunch was so helpful. The same pain was in all of our eyes. Because we've all been there. Some of us still are there. They understand the daily struggle on more than just a conceptual level. So today I am thankful for my Jessica's, for being there for me, for stuffing their faces with Mexican food with me, and for letting me scream and yell and cry and just breathe. As much as I'm still struggling with things, I still feel better somehow, and I'm walking into tomorrow with a confidence that I didn't have yesterday.

Wordless Wednesday: Absence Report

So usually my vacations from the Blog-o-sphere are followed up by a post begging forgiveness and whining about all of the things that have made me too busy to post. But today, since it's Wordless Wednesday, I figured I'd spare you the whining and show you what's been taking up my time lately. Obviously this is not all that I've been doing, but this has definitely contributed, and I think they're some pretty good excuses if you ask me (which, you probably won't!)

Rubiks Cube Cake as part of Tara's Birthday Cake Trio (Photo Credit: Greg Teets)

Ms. Pacman Cake, also part of Tara's Birthday Trio (Photo Credit: Greg Teets)

Shades of patriotism...4th of July themed cupcakes for Zachary's 1st birthday

 

 

(Photo Credit: Tabitha Davidson)

Flag/Superhero design by Tabitha, for Zachary's 1st Birthday (Photo Credit: Tabitha Davidson)

Delicious Pina Colada cupcakes with a coconut rum buttercream, pineapple reduction, toasted coconuts and maraschino cherries! (Photo Credit: My crappy cell phone)

Dr. Suess Cake for Jack's 1st Birthday (Bottom tier: one fish, two fish; Middle teir: Green eggs and ham; Top tier: Cat in the Hat, and the hat doubled as a smash cake)

Naughty cake that I can't post on my regular website! Hope you enjoy the sneak preview ;-)

I don't have time and I don't care!

What am I supposed to be doing? Baking.
What am I doing? Blogging.

And I...

Don't...

CARE!

I have no had time or energy to blog in way too long. Work has been CRAZY!

And life outside of work...hectic, too.

But it's times like these that really make me realize how lucky and blessed and fortunate I am. It's easy to forget in the good times, just how good you have it. Things are going great, everyone is happy, there is little want for anything. Laughter, and camaraderie, and fellowship...they just are.

But when things get rough, that's when you really APPRECIATE those things.

So today, in the midst of this crazy month of mine, I'm going to share some things that I'm thankful for with you.

1. I have 2 parents who have stopped at nothing to provide for me since they were just teenagers. Unlike many teen parents, especially some of those currently being glorified on MTV, my parents got jobs, saved their money and made a home for me. They had help, sure, but they have worked every single day as long as I can remember to make sure that I had a roof over my head, a bed to crawl into at night, hot food in my stomach, clothes to wear, and the support that I needed to get through school and extra curricular activities and my first job and college, etc. etc.
2. I have these amazing friends. Not let's party friends. Not let's grab drinks once a month friends. These crazy weird slightly invasive "you're not going to have a bad day and get away with it while I'm around" type of friends. Real prying bitches they are, too. They make me get into my own head and own up to my own shit and constantly improve myself. And, the bonus? They are fun as hell!
3. Income. As easy as it is for all of us to complain about our jobs, I have one! I have a job that allows me to provide for myself and my partner, and to make sure that we have a roof, and food, and bed, and clothing. I am also proud to say that I own and operate my own business on the side that provides supplemental income as well. Not only that, but blessings abound: after 11 months of unemployment, Alex has been happily working again for almost a month now!

It's easy for me to get bogged down when things get busy and feel overwhelmed but today? Today I'm stepping back from it, and just trying my best to appreciate the things that are going right. Hope everybody has a fabulous casual Friday, and a wonderful weekend. Who knows, you may just see me back in a couple of days for Sunday Stream of Consciousness!

Scrambled [with cheese?]

Lately, I've been feeling all jumbled up. Scrambled, if you will. There are so many things going on, both at work, at my own business, online, in person, with my family, with my friends...I feel like I never have time to breathe. Not even analyzing the two plus weeks prior to this post, only looking to the future--things don't get better for a while!

Out of the next 29 days I have to work, or work on cakes, or obligations to help people with something or other for all but 3 of them. As much as I love my family and my friends (and it's really nobody's fault by my own, so please don't take offense) it's difficult for me when everybody expects me to always be able to be there.

People get annoyed with me because I'm the girl at the party that likes to leave by 11:00. I am constantly berated with arguments of "just a few more minutes!" or "you never hang out!" But it's not that easy. I don't get home from work until between 7:30 and 8pm most nights, and by the time I change, cook and eat dinner, and finally settle down...it doesn't leave a whole lot of room for "me" time before I'm ready to crash and start all over again.

Work/Life balance is non-existent in my life right now, and I don't know how to remedy. I know a lot of my readers are Mommy Bloggers who balance life and so much more...how do you do it? How do you stay organized, and on top of everything? How to you get time for you? Can somebody please help me out here, because I feel like I'm swimming with one arm tied behind my back, tiring out in circles, ready to just sink!

I need a vacation, stat.

Eggplant: A Call to Arms

I hate eggplant.

Don't lecture me about eating my veggies, I eat plenty of veggies. And I've even tried eggplant. Several times. As a matter of fact, I pretty much try eggplant every single chance I get because it is such a big, beautiful purple veggie, and I hate that I hate it. I want so badly to like it.

So far I have tried it fried as an alternative to french fries, prepared as a substitute for chicken Parmesan, cooked but served cold with a vinaigrette and other veggies in a salad, and thinly sliced but raw. So far, no dice.

I kind of went through the same plight with spinach several years ago, and I finally developed a taste for it. Spinach is now one of my favorite veggies! So, I'm issuing a call to arms. I need your help, fellow inhabitants of the blogosphere! I need some delicious eggplant ideas and recipes that I can try, preferably not terribly overlapping of what I have already tried, but even that is okay if you have a killer recipe!

How do you prefer to cook it? (Grilled, roasted, etc.) What foods to you pair it with? When is the best time to buy eggplant? I need help!

e-mail me Ashlee@alwayscasualfriday.com, or post your answer in the comments! I would love to love eggplant, so I hope you guys can help!